Is your why big enough?

 

Through my years of running, my why has been fluid.  Early on, I was running to get me much needed alone time while I was in an unhappy marriage.  Running gave me an excuse to go out, alone, and spend time with my thoughts.  It gave me a space where, even if just for a few minutes, I was able to be selfish and just worry about my wants and needs - something I had precious little time for otherwise.

Over time, my why evolved into wanting to spend time with the amazing running friends I had made.  We made some wonderful memories over the years in and out of running, but none of them would have been possible without that core common interest.

I am by nature a solitary person. I love my friends, but I love my quiet time as well.  For the last few years I have evolved into mostly a solo runner.  Group runs have always been somewhat stressful for me because I always find myself forming to someone else's pace or workout and not sticking to mine.  I am a people pleaser by nature (working on that), and I inevitably abandoned my goals to defer to someone else's. Running alone means not having to negotiate pace or worry about anyone else's schedule. I can run super early or sleep in and just take off out of my door. I can stick to my workout or amend it if needed.

I know for some people, running is their source of camaraderie, and that's awesome!  Whether you choose to run alone or you choose to attend group runs, or if it is a combination of both is irrelevant.  As long as you are doing something you love BECAUSE you love it.  Peer pressure or FOMO (fear of missing out) might work for the short term, but to have a longer running career, a deeper why is important.

My why has evolved into more of a "why not?".  I still run and I still want to race long distances because there is no legitimate reason for me not to, and I still enjoy it. (Except when I eat pavement - that part stinks). One of my favorite quotes is by St. Irenaeus of Lyons - "The Glory of God is man fully alive", and I apply this to my life in all ways possible.  

I have been given the gift of good health, determination (some would say stubbornness), and the access and ability to spend hours running.  The way I choose to use this gift is to push myself and test my limits.  This won't change as I get older, even though my limits will naturally adjust themselves.  

The saddest thing for me is to see people with great potential, but without the drive or courage to try to reach it.  Everyone's potential looks different.  Find something that you love and work hard at it.  Find out how far you can go with it.  The worst that can happen is that you are better than when you started.

Happy Running (or whatever it is you choose to do)!

Edie